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The Challenge Cup Captain’s Report – October 2026  -  Pyrford G.C.

 For an October outing, the weather was fantastic — dry, mainly sunny and just enough wind to make club selection interesting. Add plenty of water hazards and a layout that punished wayward shots, and we had all the ingredients for a challenging day of golf.

Darrell, however, seemed determined to explore as many neighbouring fairways as possible. Thankfully, his recovery game was clearly on fire, judging by his score. I can personally vouch for this, having witnessed two occasions when his balls flew dangerously over my head while I was playing an entirely different hole. 

Despite his adventures, Darrell took first place with 34 points. Well played! In second place was Stephen Mayer with 31 points, a far more respectable effort following his incredible 46 points at the Captain’s Cup. Keep those handicap cuts coming, Phil!

I had the pleasure of playing alongside Mike Cook, who appeared to treat the course as a golf ball collection centre. His bag was absolutely brimming by the end, although he still seemed determined to play with the muddiest ball he could find. Perhaps he's saving the clean ones for Banstead!

Meanwhile, Jason Cross put his recent lessons to good use, claiming both Nearest the Pin and Longest Drive. Well done, Jason! 

Simon Bond found the combination of lakes, water hazards and golf all a bit too much. Having lost his singles match to Deno, he decided to withdraw from the round altogether. Whether it was the pressure of defeat or one water hazard too many, we'll never know. At least he secured the Longest Walk Award!

Our regular guest Simon Driscoll continued his consistent form with 30 points. Hopefully, we'll see him become a full Nomad next season — although we'll need to warn him that membership also comes with the occasional handicap haircut from Phil.

Thanks to everyone who turned out for another enjoyable day. Our next event is the Christmas Cup on Saturday 5 December 2026, so I look forward to seeing you all there for some festive golf and the usual questionable shot selection.

Until then, keep practising, keep recruiting, and Darrell — please check which fairway you're on before swinging!

Kit, Captain, Whispering Nomads Golf Society

 

Captain’s Report – August 2026 - Mannings Heath G.C.

Well, the summer heatwave decided to hang around for another month, and Manning Heath certainly didn’t disappoint. Beautiful sunshine, dry conditions and fairways that looked like they hadn’t seen meaningful rainfall since the invention of the golf buggy.

It was another fantastic day for the Nomads, with a good turnout and, as usual, plenty of banter before, during and after the golf.

🏆 And the winner is…

Shaun took the honours with a very well-earned victory — and, conveniently, he happens to be a member at Manning Heath.

Now, I’m not suggesting Shaun had any inside information, but he did make a few interesting decisions regarding the competition setup.

Rather than having a Longest Drive, Shaun opted for an additional Nearest the Pin competition. He then selected the championship pin positions, some of which appeared to be located somewhere around the far side of the South Downs.

Coincidence?

Of course it is.

The greens were absolutely fantastic, so full credit to the greenkeepers. Although I’m sure Shaun had absolutely nothing to do with where those flags ended up. 😂

🥈 The Handicap Secretary strikes again

In second place was Phil Cobb on 31 points, proving once again that being responsible for everyone else's handicaps doesn't necessarily mean you're going to escape the consequences yourself.

In fact, Phil can now look forward to the inevitable task of cutting his own handicap again.

There really is something deeply satisfying about a Handicap Secretary having to punish himself.

🥉 Martin gets tour-ready

Martin took third place and will now have the small matter of managing his handicap ahead of our golf tour next month.

I'm sure he’ll be carefully considering every shot between now and then.

Or, more likely, carefully considering how many shots he can lose before the tour without anyone noticing.

🎯 Nearest the Pin

With Shaun's generous decision to give us two Nearest the Pin opportunities, the honours went to:

 🎯 Stephen Killick – 5th hole

 🎯 Kit – 10th hole

I'll take that one, thank you very much. It’s nice to remind everyone that the Captain still knows how to hit a golf ball occasionally.

👋 The Guests

A big thank you to our four guests for joining us.

Even more impressive, three of the four guests managed to score better than most of the Nomads.

At this point, we really need to stop inviting people who can actually play.

To the guests — you clearly have what it takes to become proper Nomads. All you need to do now is join, pay your membership and then enjoy the full benefits of society membership…

…including the pleasure of having your handicap gradually hacked to pieces by Phil.

What more could you want?

☀  The course, the weather and Grant's lighter

The course was in great condition despite the relentless heat. The fairways were incredibly dry, while the greens were in fantastic shape and provided some excellent putting surfaces.

There was, however, one moment of genuine concern.

Every time Grant pulled out his cigarette lighter, the fairways looked understandably nervous.

One spark and we could have gone from a round of golf to an impromptu countryside fire drill.

Thankfully, the course survived.

🥑 The brunch

A number of the Nomads wisely decided to start the day with a lovely brunch before the round, which is exactly how golf should be approached.

Grant even treated himself to avocado on sourdough.

A bold culinary choice for a man who later spent the day carrying a cigarette lighter around a bone-dry golf course.

But credit where it's due — it was a fantastic day all round.

Great course, great weather, good numbers, plenty of guests and, most importantly, plenty of laughs.

Thanks to everyone who came along and helped make another excellent Nomads event.

Next month, of course, we head off on our Florida golf tour, so enjoy the UK sunshine while it lasts — although given the current heatwave, we may actually need to find somewhere cooler!

Until then, keep swinging, keep recruiting, and please keep Grant away from the fairways with that lighter.

Kit
Captain, Whispering Nomads Golf Society

   2026 Captains Cup- Captains Report

Deno chose this course for the Captains Cup as it’s one of his favourites but two things didn’t go his way: His golf was superseded by some amazing scores and he was not the Captain! So as Vice Captain with Kit celebrating his 50th birthday in the USA, we were all playing for the Vice Captain’s Cup.

Another scorching day on a dry and dusty course with lovely greens. Almost like a LIV golf atmosphere with music playing in the distance with the Wedding Reception in the Club House. Some of these scores were also professional with ten in the 30s and seven of the 12 players matching or bettering their handicaps. Even with some inside tips from local member Phil, not many hit the tough Par 3 green for the NTP, but Steve Mayer’s guest Stephen Killick took home the wine. 
Well done to new member Steve Mayer who just qualified in time to be able to take home the 1st prize and trophy with an amazing 46 points. It’s been a while since anyone played that well to suffer a large cut, so Phil was rubbing his hands

. 
A great afternoon of golf and some great scores. It’s clear that Dion needs to make more Society appearances as it was good to see him but he could not keep up with the rest. He was awarded the virtual wooden spoon as Kit still has it, but will Dion come back to collect it officially ?
See you soon at Mannings Heath, a beautiful and less forgiving course in August.

Vice Cap, Deno

 Captain's Report – June 2026
The Canon Masters Richings Park Golf Club

Another month, another Nomads adventure, and thankfully this one started with some very encouraging news.
Just two weeks ago, we were staring down the barrel of a field of four golfers. Fast forward to tee-off day and we somehow managed to get 12 players out on the course. A huge thank you to our four guests who helped swell the ranks. The Nomads' "Rent-a-Mate" programme continues to go from strength to strength and, annoyingly, seems to keep producing golfers who can actually play.
The weather was absolutely fantastic. Hot, hot, hot. Sticky at times, but with sunshine from start to finish there were certainly no complaints. The only thing melting faster than the ice creams was the confidence of those who thought Richings Park would suit the big hitters.
The course played beautifully and proved to be a great test for the shorter, more accurate golfers. Those relying on brute force and optimism spent a considerable amount of time wandering through the brambles conducting unofficial search parties.
A special mention must go to Darrell, who formed an emotional attachment to a golf ball he affectionately named "Horsham". What started as a touching friendship soon developed into something resembling the relationship between Tom Hanks and Wilson in Cast Away. Sadly, Horsham eventually met the same fate as many of Darrell's drives, disappearing into the woods never to be seen again. It was either the woods or an attempt to bring down a passing aircraft.
At the sharp end of the leaderboard, your Captain managed to navigate the heat and the hazards to take 1st place, proving that leadership by example is still very much alive and well.
In 2nd place was our Vice Captain, Deno, who once again demonstrated that he is annoyingly consistent and seemingly incapable of having a truly bad round.
Longest Drive was claimed by guest Karl Wingrove, who showed that occasionally hitting the fairway is optional when you're sending the ball into the next postcode.
Nearest the Pin went to Shaun Russell, whose precision around the flag was a welcome contrast to some of the directional challenges being experienced elsewhere on the course.
It was also great to see the return of Ravi, making a rare guest appearance after a prolonged absence. Rumours that he had retired from golf, emigrated, or become a golfing myth passed down to newer members have thankfully been proven false. Hopefully we'll see him again at the next event... although history suggests it could equally be sometime around 2029.
Away from the golf itself, there are growing concerns regarding the society handicaps. Several members have raised questions, suggestions and what can only be described as thinly veiled bribery attempts directed towards Handicap Secretary Phil. Following the Warwickshire event, Phil appears to have vanished beneath a mountain of Heroes chocolates and Lindt golf balls. Should anyone locate him, please advise him there are scorecards awaiting review.
Overall, another brilliant day in the sunshine, plenty of laughs, some surprisingly good golf, and proof that the society is still heading in the right direction.
Let's hope to see even more of you at our next tournament in July at Surrey Downs. Unfortunately, I will be away enjoying some summer sunshine elsewhere, so I leave you all in the capable hands of Vice Captain Deno.
What could possibly go wrong?
Until then, keep the sun cream handy, keep recruiting friends, and try to keep your golf balls out of the woods.
See you all soon.
KitCaptain, Whispering Nomads Golf Society

 

 Captain’s Report – May 2026The Edwards Shield – Pine Ridge Golf Club

 
At close to 30 degrees, Pine Ridge was feeling less like Surrey and more like a suspiciously affordable Mediterranean golf break. In fact, conditions were probably better than most actual golfing destinations abroad — minus the all-inclusive drinks package and someone reserving sunbeds at 6am.
Despite the glorious weather, only 8 brave Nomads made the trip to Pine Ridge Golf Club, a course we’ve played before and one that historically seems to favour the society’s higher scorers (bandits). Previous winning totals have reached a ridiculous 46 points, although perhaps the heat got to everyone this time around.
This year’s Edwards Shield champion was Derek, who ground out a winning score of 37 points. Solid scoring in the heat and fully deserved — well played Derek.
In second place was our newest official member, Marc, making quite the impression on debut with 35 points. An excellent first outing, although there were immediate concerns raised when he discovered how the handicap system actually works and realised this score might result in an early-season cut already. Safe to say the phrase “I didn’t know that would happen” was heard more than once in the clubhouse afterwards. Welcome to the Nomads, Marc — enjoy the shots while they last.
Interestingly, 50% of the field managed scores in the 30s, while the remaining half battled away somewhere in the late 20s and varying stages of dehydration.
Unfortunately, one man struggled more than most…Simon finished bottom of the pile after what can only be described as a deeply spiritual round of golf. Large portions of the day appeared to be spent admiring Pine Ridge’s woodland scenery, with particular focus on the root systems and structural integrity of several pine trees. Rumours that he was considering a career in forestry remain unconfirmed.

A special mention must go to Graham’s trolley, which spent most of the afternoon attempting to escape downhill whenever he took his hands off it for more than three seconds — the grand finale being a full dive into a bunker. To be fair, the trolley probably handled the bunker better than Graham did all day.
That said, Graham did at least rediscover his driver swing, taking home Longest Drive honours.
Meanwhile, Nearest the Pin went to Phil, who quietly went about his business while the rest of the group melted in the heat. At one stage he looked less like a golfer and more like a man simply trying to survive until the halfway house opened again.
All in all, another cracking day in the sunshine with plenty of laughs, questionable golf, and mild heatstroke.
Thanks to everyone who made the effort to come along — hopefully we can get the Nomads numbers back up for the next event.
I’ll see some of you at The Warwickshire Golf & Country Club in June.
Until then, enjoy the rest of the bank holiday sunshine, and remember to keep your trolleys under supervision at all times!

 

2026 Spring Bowl - Captains Report

Well, what a day that was. April is usually known for showers, but clearly no one told the weather gods at Sweetwoods Park Golf Club — we were treated to wall-to-wall sunshine and near-perfect golfing conditions. Not a waterproof in sight, which for this time of year is borderline suspicious.
The course itself went down a treat with the members. Set against the stunning Kent countryside, Sweetwoods delivered some cracking holes, a few well-placed bits of water to keep things interesting, but nothing too terrifying (unless you’re Darrell, but more on that later).
A massive highlight — 20 golfers turned out, our biggest attendance in a long time. Let’s not make that a one-off lads… momentum is building, and long may it continue.
Special mention to Darrell, who turned up mob-handed with what can only be described as his “core social circle” — 5 mates plus himself, and 6 guests in total. Great to see, and hopefully we can convert a few of those into full-time Nomads over the season.
Now, onto the golf…Judging by the scores, Sweetwoods proved a tricky customer for first-timers, with only three players breaking the 30-point barrier.
At the top of the leaderboard:
    🥇 Deno stormed to victory with a very tidy 35 points, also casually picking up nearest the pin for good measure — greedy.
    🥈 Luigi followed in second with 32 points, a strong showing on a course that clearly wasn’t giving much away.
    💪 Longest Drive went to Phill Cobb, who clearly found a fairway (at least once).
We also had a couple of head-to-head grudge matches running alongside:
#    Richard got the better of Phil
# Mike came out on top against Graham
Now, onto possibly the most important performance metric of the day — stamina.
Having both flown back from the US that very morning, Deno and Darrell decided to test the “jet lag performance theory.”
#    For Deno, it clearly works — maybe we should all try long-haul flights pre-round.
#    For Darrell… less so. Reports suggest he spent part of the round communing with local wildlife, including what looked like a meaningful exchange with a group of squirrels deep in the bushes.
And finally, the much-coveted (and hotly contested) Longest Walk Award goes to Derek, who managed to compile 20 points the hard way. Commitment to the step count, if nothing else.
All in all, a fantastic day — great course, great weather, and even better turnout.
👉 Let’s keep the numbers up and aim for another big showing next month.
Until then, keep swinging (and maybe avoid early morning transatlantic flights… unless you’re Deno

2026 Potholers Cup - Captains Report

We were back to Hoebridge for the first Nomads event of 2026. A good turnout with Suresh bringing his son Brijesh as a possible future Nomads member and even Jack was back after being AWOL for a couple of years !! This course is always reliable in the spring as it drains well so the fairways were in good nick. However, the greens were being maintained so the sand made putting a nightmare. Lots of reports of 3-putts and even 4-putts and very bobbly greens which just killed the speed.
Nevertheless, we soldiered on and played in gusty winds, lovely sunshine, rain and even hail. A test for even the most hardened golfer. Unlike last year, we weren’t rained off after 9 holes.
Martin Wingrove was the eventual winner but due to a managerial oversight, there were no prizes and the Potholer’s Trophy was still on holiday with its previous owner in Spain. Grant came out of winter hibernation to come in 2nd and win the longest drive and Phil was a creditable 3rd as well as winning his singles match. Terry managed to get nearest to the pin despite having a dodgy elbow. Prizes will be awarded next month after a visit to shops.

A good start to the year and let’s hope we keep up the momentum.
Deno (vice captain)